Work Hard, Escape Harder: The Hong Kong Holiday Trap

Hong Kong is one of the world’s busiest hubs for outbound travel.

 

Hong Kongers take a remarkable number of trips abroad far more than most cities of similar size. 

 

Sitting in a convenient spot on the map, the city offers easy access to many appealing destinations across East and Southeast Asia and beyond, such as Japan (my favorite!), Thailand, Taiwan, Singapore, Australia and so on.

 

We are also well known for the “work hard, play hard” pattern. Long working hours and a competitive environment are the norm, and surveys regularly show elevated stress and strained work-life balance. 

 

In this setting the usual “rewards” for hard work are excellent food (Hong Kong remains a genuine culinary capital) and TRAVEL.

 

To you, working long hours may be simply part of life. Planning and going on holiday is the other side of the coin. 

 

The intensity of the travel often mirrors the intensity of the work. Working hard does not necessarily mean taking a longer holiday. 

 

The intensity can show up in how much you spend, the number of places you visit, the activities you pack in, or the amount and type of food you eat. The underlying idea is to “balance out” the hard work.

 

Most of the time, though, you come back feeling exhausted rather than refreshed and recovered.

And usually you feel a dip towards the end of the holiday and start to dread returning home (or to reality).

 

You may wonder: how can I have a better relationship with holidays? How can I come back not with that dread, but feeling fuelled and energised?

 

Most people’s intention is, of course, to feel alive, to enjoy pleasure and the freedom of life. When that peak of freedom and pleasure is concentrated almost entirely in the holiday, it creates a sharp contrast with everyday reality.

 

That transition itself becomes an emotional roller-coaster that often leaves people feeling more exhausted, tired and unfulfilled.

 

I have even heard a client say, “Sometimes I try to avoid having too much fun on holidays because coming down to reality is too much to bear.”

 

If this sounds far-fetched to you, I am glad you are not one of them. In fact the number of people who experience some version of post-holiday blues is larger than many imagine. It is a common enough feeling that it has been widely discussed and surveyed in many places.

 

So what can we do to live a life that does not rely so heavily on holidays? Or, for some of you, how can the transition be smoother?

 

The ideal scenario is a life that already feels fulfilling and joyful, so that going on holiday is simply another way to enrich it further.

 

But you say think: Is that even possible?

 

When we need a holiday to feel better, and when being deprived of it quickly leaves us depressed or down, we are already experiencing something similar to “withdrawal.”

 

The difference is that holidays themselves are not inherently harmful in the way cocaine or OxyContin are. Yet the absence of them can still feel painful to bear. 

 

And because holidays (like a glass of wine) are socially acceptable, we are often less aware of the pattern they can reinforce.

 

What I want to say is that these are, in the end, coping mechanisms. The action itself is not the problem. What we are trying to evade by using the action is the problem.

 

So my question is: what in life are you trying to evade?

 

Is it the heavy obligations at work that leave you feeling trapped? The perpetual problems with your partner? Or the lack of purpose even when you seem to have everything?

 

Running away from them will not make them disappear.

 

The hardest truth is that they will chase after you faster and harder.

 

Relationships, parenting and financial pressures can keep bugging you.

 

You already know the workload is more than you can reasonably handle, yet you normalise it: “This is what I have to do. I am a provider and I just need to suck it up.” 

 

You may think asking for help is weakness. You may think stepping back from some duties is irresponsible. 

You may believe there is simply no choice. 

 

In general you feel trapped and stuck.

 

Or you settle in a less-than-fulfilling relationship by not expressing what you need, going along while telling yourself this is love, or believing you cannot find better because you are not enough.

 

In everyday life you feel you do not have a choice.  And that is where the lack of freedom sits.

 

I know. This can sound harsh.

 

But yes, this is the hard look we need to take in the mirror.

 

And we will talk about how we can build a life that feels alive and free, with realistic steps.